Gossip School

Guy A likes Girl A.
Girl A likes Guy B.
Girl B likes Guy A
Guy B is often found playfully flirting with Guy C.
Guy C likes Girl B.
Guy B likes Girl C
Girl C likes Girl A
Guy D likes Girl D, who likes Guy D but both won't admit it.
Guy E likes Guy E
Guy F likes Guy G, and Guy G likes Guy E, who likes Guy E
Girl E is gossiping with everyone about it.
Sleaze A likes Girls, A, B, C, D and E, and tries to hang out with Guy A, B, C, D, E, F and G
Guy A tells Girl B who in-turn tells Girl A.
Girl A hooks up with Guy D.
Guy B hooks up with Girl B, but has a hidden affair with Guy C and Girl A
Guy C hooks up with Girl E, but maintains the love for Guy B.
Guy E stares at himself in the mirror.
Guy F hooks up with Girl C.
Guy G likes Slut A because he doesn't know she is Slut A
Slut A gets with Guy G. They become PDA couple
Sleaze A hits on Slut A, and Girls A, B, C, D and E, despite their coupled status.
Girl D dates outside of school, with Outside School Guy
Guys, A, B, C, D, E, F and G all love Outside School Guy, while Sleaze A doesn't because OS Guy is dating Girl D
Guy H is dating Bitch A, and becomes Dickhead A, with couple becoming Couple D
Teacher A makes reference to the complicated system in which the students follow.
Guy M, who gossips with Girls K, L, T , A, W, Q, R, E, Y and U, and friends with Guy A, C, D, O, I, L, K, V, X, Z, N and T.
Guys T, N, X, K, L and M hates Sleaze B, who hits on Girls H, I, T, M, A and N, and tries to be friends with Guys D, I, C, K, H, E, A and D.
Guys T, N, X, K, V and M hate Slut A, and Bitch A, because Slut A, is a slut and Bitch A is a bitch.
Girls *alphabet* hates Sleazes A and B because they are sleazes.
Slut A is dating Guy G, but often is found flirting with Guy K, and hitting on Guy Z, also attempting to sit on the laps of Guys H, S, Q, B, C, D and W.
Guys *alphabet* all love Teacher A, and Outside School Guy.... and food.
Guys *alphabet* and Girls *alphabet* love Guy E, who likes Guy E.
Guy E, also likes Hot Girl A, but Hot Girl A is Megan Fox.
Guy E often flirts with Guy T and S, and is often whipped by Girl T and L.
Guy E starts a lot of fights with Girl J and S.
Sleaze A tries to be friends with Guy E, because Girls *alphabet* like Guy E
Sleaze B is a dickhead and thinks he is better than Guy E, T, S, K, J and H and says that Guy T and Guy K should get together because they are so gay.
Guy K wants to hurt Sleaze A and B.
Guy B's hidden affair with Girl A and Guy C is revealed, and Girl B dumps Guy B for Guy J.
PDA couple gross everyone out.
No one likes Couple A, because they annoy everyone.
Guy E is lost, and Guy M then shares the gossip with Guy E, who is then up-to-date.
Guy E hates Sleaze A and B, Couple A, PDA couple and Slut A, because Guy M told him to.

I'm so lost now.